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I felt you die.I don't know how much time passed before there was a banging on thefront door, followed by a key being turned in the lock and peoplehurrying over and hugging me. It was your parents, come to comforttheir daughter. That's when I started to sob uncontrollably. I knew inthat moment that I could never, must never tell them you were dead. Icouldn't do that to them. And so I cried for you, for their loss andfor mine, cried like I never had before. I was inconsolable.The days and weeks that followed were almost unbearable. I don't knowhow you can be in such pain and still carry on, but you do. After afashion. The world seemed grey and tasteless with you gone, as if allthe joy had been sucked out of it, and I moved through it like aphantom. People were sympathetic, but anything more than a simple "I'msorry for your loss" was too much for me to cope with. Everything justhurt too much. At first, I couldn't bear to look at my reflection, knowing that every time I did I'd see you. The thought of her made me want to die, disappear, never be found. I never wanted her to find me like that, opening my bedroom door and smell my horrendous odor and find me lying on the ground in my own blood. She was the reason I held off so long on trying harder for help. I knew she cared most about me; she was the one knocking at the door, calling me. She would be the one to see me at my worst. I would rather her never seen me again then to have seen me like that. I was selfish though. I wanted to live more than I wanted to protect her."Please don't cry. You're everything to me, you saved me. I fell, it was my fault, I should have told someone, you can't know the future."The door opened and my parents walked in. Camryn tried her best to suck her tears back in and pulled off me."I'm so sorry," she said to my parents, "I'll leave you alone." It's not your fault;" my mom consoled her, "you're the one that saved his life." My mom tried resting her hand on Camryn's shoulder as she.
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